Just Be Here
by WasJustAReader
Summary: Scully's not okay after the events of "All Souls," and Mulder tries to understand what he can do. Also posted on AO3


**I started this months ago after first watching All Souls (5.17). It sat unfinished on my computer for a while before I finally came back to it a few nights ago. I was unsatisfied with the way everyone's emotional state was left at the end of the episode, so I decided to take matters into my own hands. Sorry if there's a mood disconnect, like I said, the time between me watching the episode and me finishing this one shot was long.**

Clad in flannel pajama pants and an old FBI t-shirt, Scully had just settled in on her couch to watch _The Sound of Music_ when there was a knock at her door. She sighed – head lolling back on the sofa – and seriously considered ignoring whoever it was. But curiosity won out and she hauled herself up from the cushions to peer through her peephole. There was nobody there.

Opening the door cautiously, Scully peered up and down the hall just as Mulder was about to disappear around the corner.

"Mulder!" she called after him as she noticed the pizza box and bottle of wine sitting on her doormat.

Stooping to pluck a sticky note off of the box Scully frowned, recognizing her partner's scrawl.

"Mulder, get back here. What the hell is this?" she called.

She heard a sigh from the end of the hall and her partner's footsteps slowly getting closer while she read.

Scully,

It seems like you want to be alone on this one, but I thought you could use some fuel. I hope you're feeling better.

Mulder

"What the _hell_ is this?" she demanded again, now face to face with her rather startled looking partner. "You seriously thought it would be a good idea to ding dong ditch me with pizza and wine? Really, Mulder?!"

With each word Scully's voice was getting more and more frantic, and Mulder was quickly becoming alarmed. And confused.

"I—I didn't think you wanted me around" he stuttered. "It definitely seemed like you didn't want me on the case."

Scully huffed in frustration and shook her head sharply as if to clear it of unwanted thoughts, mirroring her actions earlier that day in Father Gregory's church.

"I didn't," she hissed. "Not at first. This was personal, Mulder!" Scully's voice was beginning to break, going from near shouting to something else. Something more ragged and broken. "But it hurt when you weren't there."

Mulder, still not quite following, hesitantly reached out to wipe away a stray tear making its way down Scully's cheek, but she quickly stepped back out of his reach.

"No, Mulder. I'm upset with you."

"Okay," Mulder replied softly, dropping his hand. "May I come in, then? Help me understand?"

Scully ran a hand through her hair and rested her forehead on the doorframe for a moment before replying. She looked exhausted. "Fine. Bring those." She nodded at the pizza and alcohol still sitting on the floor at her feet before turning on her heel and resuming her place on the couch. After a quick glance at the tv, Scully stabbed her thumb into the remote, shutting off her movie.

When she looked up Mulder was standing awkwardly just inside the door, pizza in one hand, wine bottle in the other, unsure what Scully wanted him to do.

"Oh for god's sake, Mulder," she groaned, jerking her head toward the expanse of empty couch beside her.

Smiling slightly, Mulder deposited his gifts on the coffee table before joining his partner on the sofa.

"Tell me, Scully. What do you mean it hurt when I wasn't there? You called and I came, right?"

"Yes, yes, you did. You were there for the case. But you weren't there for _me_ , Mulder. I told you about seeing Emily and… you… sent me away. You… I was upset, Mulder! Couldn't you see that? I _am_ upset! You're usually obnoxiously good at getting inside my head and this time you just… it all felt like a brush off!"

Mulder's brow furrowed slightly. "So… you're upset that I couldn't read your mind?" he asked, genuinely puzzled.

"No, of course not!" Scully scoffed. "Yes. Maybe." She exhaled sharply and pressed the heels of her hands into her closed eyes. "I don't know."

"Scully, I didn't know what you wanted from me. I still don't. You called me for help on the case, but you didn't seem to accept any of my contributions. I thought you wanted to deal with this one on your own. I thought you were doing that stubborn independent thing you do."

Scully pinched the bridge of her nose and tipped head onto the back of the sofa. "I was. But I thought – I hoped – that you'd see through it," she whispered, tears threatening to fall.

Mulder sighed heavily. "Well, apparently I didn't. I'm sorry."

The pair sat in silence for a few minutes, unsure where to go from there. Finally, Mulder broke the ice.

"Can you tell me what you need now? Should I go?"

"No."

"No you can't tell me, or no I shouldn't go?"

"Mulder," Scully's voice broke. "You're an idiot."

He chuckled humorlessly. "I know, but I'll take that as an invitation to stay." He moved to stand, reaching for the wine bottle. "Would you like a glass?"

Scullly stopped him with a hand on his arm. "I saw her," she whispered. "I saw her, and she asked me to let her go. She _told_ me to let her go."

Mulder deflated and sagged back onto the couch, hesitantly pulling his partner into his arms. When she didn't resist he began rubbing small circles on her back.

"I don't know what it takes to believe anymore. I don't know what's real," she murmured, breath warm against his neck.

"I know."

"You know what's real, or you know I don't?" Scully asked softly, throwing his structure back at him as she swiped at a renegade tear coursing down her cheek.

Mulder chuckled and Scully could feel it in her own chest, pressed so tightly to his.

"I know you don't know. And I know that scares you. It scares me, too, the not knowing. But I know something else." He paused, carding his fingers through her hair.

"Mulder?" Scully prompted, craning her neck to meet his gaze.

"This. I know this," he said solemnly.

Scully stared at him, bewildered, brows arched over still glassy eyes.

"What?"

"I know that at least we don't know together. And that while I may be an idiot, _you_ are a very intelligent woman. Between the two of us, I like to believe that we can figure it out."

Scully sighed. "Good, because I really would like some of that wine," she deadpanned.

A true smile lit Mulder's face for a moment before fading again into concern. "Scully…"

"I know. We'll talk. Later. For now, I'd like you to just be here with me, okay?"

"Okay. Pizza and wine, coming right up."


End file.
